NOTES
You don’t have to do any of this perfectly to make a difference.
Just take the ideas that feel the most fun for you and implement those.
Knowing you can come back to this material at any time.
Food moralizing trap
no bad foods >> portion size me movie
Food scarcity thinking >> last supper eating
It’s not about eating less – it’s about eating ENOUGH and enjoying yourself
The secret to enjoying yourself without guilt, shame or regret. >> TEA
HOW SELF TALK WORKS
TEA – Thoughts > EMOTIONS > ACTIONS > Results
eg. C. Jules ate 2 cookies. –
T. I’m so stupid, I’ll never learn, I can’t be trusted
E. shame guilt
A. eat more cookies >> feel even worse.
T. Those cookies were so amazing they are exactly what I needed.
E. satisfied
A. move on to something else.
T. I’ve blown my diet now. I may as well finish the packet. Get rid of them
E. discouraged.
A. finish the pack. >>
eg. C. Thanksgiving dinner
T. This is so delicious. I should stop but I don’t want to. I won’t get to enjoy this again
E. rebellious scarcity
A. Over eat.
T. It’s better when I don’t over stuff myself because I’ll sleep better, there will be amazing leftovers tomorrow.
E. calm
A. Stop eating when satisfied.
We think it’s the circumstances that cause our feelings but it’s actually our thoughts. We can choose thoughts that don’t make us feel ashamed or guilty. We can decide.
_____________________________
Doable 4-step process that gives you the freedom to have fun without fear of over-doing it.
You don’t have to apply all the steps every single time.
Even one will make a difference.
It doesn’t have to be perfect.
DILL
STEP 1. D – Decide in Advance (commit and plan)
Use prefrontal cortex
Better decisions
Realistic
Can be specific – eg. I’ll have 4 glasses of wine.
Can be general – I’ll stop when I feel satisfied.
STEP 2. I – Imagine
Practice in your mind
Anticipate obstacles
eg basket ball + piano research
builds muscles
helps you plan for how to handle problems
STEP 3. L – Laugh at your Urges.
What are urges?
Most of us either resist or distract – not long term solution
What to do instead – allow the urges to be there – have fun with it.
When you have the urge to drink when you haven’t planned.
Or have MORE than your plan you need to practice handling this.
It will get easier with time.
What will you make your urge mean?
Of course I want another glass. Of course I want wine now.
Hello little urge – I see you. Come on in. Sit down here and make yourself at home. Ellens giraffe
We’re going to hang out. It’s totally cool for you to be here. I’m going to stick to my plan anyway.
STEP 4. L – Learn – What will you do differently next time?
Not from judgement or shame.
Curiosity not condemnation.
Einstein quote – “a person who never made a mistake never tried anything new.”
The point isnโt to be perfect and never over eat or over drink – itโs to do things better than before.
_____________________________
8 simple ways to be a gracious guest (or host) without over indulging.
1. Let your host know in advance. >>Decide priorities>> more important to be a ‘good’ guest OR to take care of yourself.
2. Offer to bring something.
3. Show your appreciation with words instead of a clean plate. eg. sending a thank you text.
4. Remember you always control HOW MUCH you eat. Use your self talk to stop when you’re full.
5. Listen to Nigella >> “No one is interested in anyone else. If you donโt tell them they wonโt notice.”
6. Think abundance not last supper. There will be more amazing food in my future.
7. Decide to stop picking when cooking / cleaning up >> like flicking a switch in my head. Imagine, later plate, random bites jar, I don’t use my body as a rubbish bin, pause. You can pause and re-imagine at any time.
8. Trust the process! >> Decide, Imagine + plan for obstacles Laugh Learn
_____________________________
How to hangover-proof your celebrations.
Use our process DILL – especially deciding.
_____________________________
EXERCISE: Your Why
Write a list of all the reasons why it will be better when you stop and stick to your plan.
eg. sleep, self trust, role model for others, feel better later, better leftovers.
>> INTENTIONAL THOUGHTS
I can do this
I WANT to do this.
It’s better when I stop because….
There will be more amazing food / wine
Of course I want more
_____________________________
The easiest way to build self trust even if you have a history of breaking promises to yourself.
Trust is a feeling.
So we just have to think thoughts that create that feeling.
Decide to become someone who trusts themselves around food.
Stop saying ‘I don’t trust myself’ or ‘trust in myself if low’
Practice thinking ‘I trust myself’ OR a laddering thought
eg. I’m learning to … It’s possible to… I want to trust myself
Look for evidence that it is true AND reframe evidence that it isn’t.
What will you make it mean when you mess up?
eg. eating more than you planned
eg. think about a friend who you trust – how do you respond if they do something wrong.
_____________________________
The Imagine Challenge.
Imagine every day in December
How to join the challenge
1. Leave a comment below saying you’re in
2. Print your star chart (or make your own)
How to participate
Take 2 minutes to think about your day and imagine it going well.
Read the intentional thoughts on the star chart page.
Need help?
Have a question? Want coaching on a particular situation. Leave a comment below.
With love,
Jules x
I found getting a Podcast App on my phone and listening to Jules Challenge podcasts wherever I may be or when I am filled with doubt keeps me motivated and ready to believe I can do it.
LOVE it Marie!
First zoom, now podcasts – you are on fire!
I want to participate! Already struggling and need help!
You’re in the right place Leslie!
Just trust the process – you can do this ๐
Four days late but I’M IN. Just heard todays poscast and found it inspirational. Beginning to believe that I can make it.
Not late at all Marie!
It’s the perfect time to start ๐
Iโm a little late to the party but Iโm in to start advent challenge tomorrow!!
It’s the perfect time to start Elizabeth!
Ok, I’m in ! It looks very interesting ๐
Brilliant Emilie!
I’m in. I think this might actually work for me!!
It WILL work for you Johnny5 ๐
Just trust the process.
I’m in!
Wonderful Nicole!
Sounds good Iโm in
Excellent Natasha ๐
I will be joining the Advent “Imagine” challenge! Blessings and Joy to you and yours,
Pam
Fantastic Pam!
I’m in for the Imagine Advent Challenge!
Magnificent Meg!
Iโm in for the December challenge. Star chart printed, ready to start thinking about DILL. Thanks Jules, enjoyed the workshop!
So glad you enjoyed the workshop Sheila!
Now we get to have the fun of putting it into practice – and getting the results ๐
Iโm in for the challenge as well!
Wonderful Sherry!
I’m in.
Excellent Kim!
I’m in!
Sensational Caitlin!
Iโm in.
Nice one Linda!
I’m in for the December challenge.
Brilliant Terri!
I’m in! Thank you, Jules!!
So fun Justina!
Iโm in
Excellent Bernd!
I am in ๐ looking forward to starting the fun world of intuitive eating with you all.
Brilliant Bengisu!
I’m in.
Amy
Awesome Amy!
Iโm in!
Fantastic Stephanie!
Iโm adding this imagining to my Advent practice today! Thank you, Jules for offering this learning opportunity.
Excellent Jen!
What else do you do for advent?
Im in
Brilliant Debbie!
I am in
Excellent Kate!
Iโm in!
Awesome Hannie!
Iโm in. Enjoying your podcast. Will watch the video at the weekend.
Iโm in. Enjoying your podcast and plan to watch the video at the weekend
Brilliant Linda!
Thanks Jules … I’m in on the imagine challenge for December. Couldn’t be a better time to start. Cheers
Awesome Christine! Now is always the best time to start ๐
Hi Jules, the video cut out at 1:06 with just a spinning wheel
That’s so weird Sandy!
I just skipped through and it played until the end for me. Do you want to try refreshing the page and trying again.
Let me know how you get on.
Jx
Yes I’m in
Brilliant Leonie!
Yes, I’m in!
Awesome Denise!
I still cant connect to Zoom to watch the reply.I am tired of trying!How on earth foo I watch it?I live in NZ .KInd Regards Bebaki
Sorry Bebaki!
It took me a while to upload the video. The replay video is up now.
Let me know if you can see it OK.
Jx
Hi Jules from London UK
I’ve just booked for this but will probably watch on catch-up rather than live.
When I entered my payment details it confirmed that it was the ‘kitchen confidence’ workshop but just wanted to clarify that this is the one I want!
Best. Louise
Yes it’s the Guilt-Free one Louise – I must have a setting in my system wrong. Sorry for the confusion and hope you enjoy the recording!